The Roasting Of Bill Shatner

While the trivia on the Comedy Central site was fun...

When it comes to the roast itself, I have to say, I think I've been out of circulation too long. I remember roasts back when they were on 'regular' television. I don't remember the raunch level being that high. Actually, it couldn't have been. The censors would never have let it on the air. Why they bothered to bleep out the little they did is a wonder to me.

Editing for content is generally a mystery to me anyway. If I tune in to watch The Terminator, I'm expecting to watch The Terminator, not some whitewashed film in which the killing machine doesn't unload a full clip into his victims just to make sure they are dead. A film in which the (low) classic line "Fuck you, Asshole!" gets bleeped or changed. What's the point in watching a film that has been modified like that? If you're a bible thumper who gets upset at that kind of language and graphic violence, I daresay that a nicer version of the killing machine is not going to win you over. Why would they even tune in at all, other than to make sure the rest of us aren't watching the filth that they object to?

Editing for content pretty much sums up why I don't watch films on 'regular' television in the first place. Time was, I could watch movies and shows on cable channels and see them unedited; well, at least unedited except for the asinine pan and scan process, that is. But at least the content wasn't modified to suit the squeamish. Highlander chops off heads, Terminator uses full clips, the horror films are in full gore mode, and people talk like average people rather than the cardboard cutouts in Mayberry. Apparently, this is no longer the case.

So I'm sitting there last night, watching without a doubt the raunchiest roast I've ever seen, and they're bleeping the fucks and shits and whatever. Betty White can tell a joke about a cock ring (Not her best bit. When I watched the show through a second time I would have sworn that she was consciously imitating Don Rickles and Phyllis Diller, or Perhaps Ruth Buzzi, at different points in her routine, as sort of a salute to the old Dean Martin Roasts. Pretty funny) but she can't say the word 'cock', you have to bleep it? On Comedy Central, a cable channel I have to pay for, part of a service I requested? After midnight, no less? I don't get it.

I hate to break it to you people, I'm a pretty good lip reader these days. Partial deafness forces that on you (a condition Bill and I share) I saw her say the word. If I wanted to get offended, the joke itself would have been offensive, hearing the word would have made no difference. As it is, the fact that the content was edited at all is offensive to me.

Here's the point I'm getting at. If something offends me, I don't turn it on. I generally don't watch Comedy Central because the raunch level is too high. Nothing at all to do with the amount of 'cursing' that goes on, and everything to do with the continuous blatant sexual references. I have a pre-teen in the house, he doesn't need that kind of exposure, so I don't watch it (the daughter stumbled in on The Succubus episode of South Park when she was about the son's age now. She had nightmares about it afterwards. I've just steered clear of the channel since) I also don't watch many of my favorite films with the kids in the room, and for much the same reason.

[The children generally don't want to watch what I watch anyway (Discovery Channels, mostly) They want to watch Cartoon Network, which I have to turn off after Adult Swim starts. Something else I don't get. A network that caters to children, that has pretty graphic adult content after 10 pm. Futurama is great. Family Guy, I just don't get. It just gets lamer from that point on, until you hit the Anime at two in the morning. What's with that? Why all on the same channel?]

I tuned in to Comedy Central after putting the kids to bed, because I suspected what I was going to be watching would be off the charts on the raunch scale. It was. I don't even know if the wife will be able to sit through it. I don't know why I bothered. The lame-ass 'bleeping' every few minutes in the middle of jokes that wouldn't make the uncensored list in the first place just ruins the whole effect. What a waste.

Periodically, when watching network television, I catch the occasional promo for "the Network Premiere of (insert sex and gore fest film name here)" and I turn to the wife and say, "How are they going to make that film conform to network censor standards?" I never find out, because I either have the film on disk, or I can rent it. When it comes to Comedy Central's offerings, I'll probably never see the uncensored versions. I paid for it once already, and they shafted me on content. Why would I bother to pay for it again?

No comments:

Post a Comment

Ad Hominems, Spam and Advertisements will be mercilessly deleted. All other comments are eagerly anticipated.